29 September 2016


by Andy Weddington
Thursday, 29 September 2016

The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve your lie. George Deukmejian

This morning I was startled awake at 0300.

Since, I've watched news - in disgust; worked the puzzle page in USA Today; flipped through some two dozen channels looking for something interesting; finally settled on the Golf Channel half tuned in to a program called 'Morning Drive'; and downed four cups of coffee, a handful of Ritz crackers, half a banana, and a couple tablespoons of crunchy peanut butter. 

It's stormy out. 

I'm considering a workout but will likely talk myself out of it favoring a nap. 

The golf reminded me of the recent death of Arnold Palmer - a giant and champion of the game, in every respect, from titles to trophies to integrity. 

Most importantly, the integrity. 

Golfers and integrity - synonyms. 

I have seen integrity more than once watching the PGA. I have seen players self-impose strokes. And do so to their own demise when leading a tournament on Sunday. Big money is at stake and they do it anyway. 

When was the last time you saw an NFL ball carrier admit to an official his knee did, after being hit by an opponent, touch the ground before entering the end zone?

When was the last time you saw an NBA player call a double dribble on himself and hand the ball to a referee? Or admit to fouling a shooter?


Professional golfers have integrity. They play the ball, no matter the lie. 

Professional weasels do not have integrity. They play ball and lie no matter what. 

Yesterday I watched Mr. James Comey, Director, FBI, testify before congress.

Playing ball, he tried to improve his lie. And with that self-imposed the title weasel.   

On this morning's news was replay of an exchange between Mr. Comey and Congressman Trey Gowdy (R, SC) who'd expressed disappointment and not recognizing the FBI he knew.

A curt reply defending the FBI came from Mr. Comey. He looked and sounded like a weasel. 

Sometimes when professional golfers assess themselves a stroke for ball movement that movement is barely detectable even when caught on video. For distance, certainly not anyone in the gallery will see the movement (unless lucky through binoculars). The player, in the name of protecting the integrity of the game, imposes the stroke anyway.   

Today's enormous national gallery watching the presidential race has seen political movement that breaches not only all sense of ethics, morals, and principles but the written rules of the game and (law of the) land. 

Mrs. Hillary Clinton, the player, self-impose a penalty stroke? 

Not a chance.  

Violations are on video and record and could not be more blatant.

Each effort to improve her lie has worsened her position. But on she lies.

Mr. Comey, a rules official, impose a penalty stroke?

Not a chance. He's worked to improve Mrs. Clinton's lies. But failed. 

I never met Arnold Palmer. But it doesn't take a stroke of genius to conclude he'd have no time for anyone void integrity; a character trait not restricted to any profession nor is it situational.

Professional weasels sometimes play golf - bad lies assured - or something vaguely resembling the game played by professional golfers - bad lies played. 

So goes the difference between balls labeled Titleist and (the) entitled with balls. 

What's the gallery going to do about it?

How about a birdie, for starters! 

I'd sure like to play 18 with Mr. Gowdy. No lie. 

1 comment:

Robert Barrow said...

I enjoyed that piece…every stroke of it. You teed it up nicely. I’m teed off it has come to this. I’m tired of putting around. We need a leader who will drive up to greater distances. We have people and balls that need to “get in the hole!”