H, YOU DELETED THE H!

H, YOU DELETED THE H!
by Andy Weddington
Friday, 21 October 2016

Wikileaks - the greatest fool-proof truth-teller since polygraph. A. F. Weddington 

Just a few days after the second (presidential) debate I wrote commentary opining Mr. Trump and Mrs. Clinton should be subjected to a urinalysis before the third debate. 

Why? 

Because the prospective commander-in-chief (of every single person in uniform - rank notwithstanding) should be subjected to the same mandatory testing - routine and random.

Popping positive is more telling about character (and clear thinking thus decision-making) than just drug use. 

A Marine infantryman, I believe in leadership by example. 

Out front and showing the way - a leader does not exempt self from that which those led must do. RHIP - Rank Has Its Privileges - does not apply.

Not a week before the third debate, Mr. Trump called for drug testing. 

Was that a logical move? 

Or is someone aboard the engine of the Trump Train tuning in to this forum?

Last evening I watched some of the Al Smith Charity Dinner coverage - of first Mr. Trump then Mrs. Clinton continue their mutual attack. 

From both, poor camouflage strained the "good-natured" roasts. But what's at stake is no laughing matter.

Mr. Trump's barbs where cleverly worded arrangements of truths. 

Mrs. Clinton's were, too, cleverly worded but, still, based on allegations (and some downright lies) not facts. 

It was Mrs. Clinton who brought up Mr. Trump's call for drug testing.

She confessed.

To use of a "performance enhancer." 

And clarified her admission with (debate) "preparation."

Without pause, I blurted, "H, you deleted the H!"

Deleting - wiping - something H is good at. 

Preparation H - an off-the-shelf concoction used to temporarily shrink swollen tissue (tissue where the sun doesn't shine). 

That is, with ointment appointment comes temporary soothing relief from swelling, itching, burning, and general discomfort caused by hemorrhoids - but only for the user. All others suffer, still; unfortunately. And that we do. 

Speaking of sunshine, did you know Preparation H was initially marketed as a cream to treat sunburn? 

True. 

And, did you know, some people, the vain, secretly (though it's not classified) apply Preparation H to the face, especially around the peepers, with hope of shrinking bags and wrinkles?

True. 

Does Mrs. Clinton, for her lying eyes?

Does Mr. Trump, for relief from rigging? 

Never mind drug testing and polygraphs. 

For truth, more Wikileaks forthcoming.

Now, pardon me. Time for (breakfast) - preparation - h(ominy grits with butter and salt and pepper); a southerner's temporary relief from swelling, itching, burning, and general discomfort caused by handshakers and harangers. 

Post Script

Whomever's elected should be required, by law, to take a urinalysis. Popping positive for any illegal substance disqualifies from holding office. And that applies to all elected offices - at every level of government (with routine and random testing throughout tenure in office). No exceptions.