REFLECTING ON A SAILOR AND HIS MOM

REFLECTING ON A SAILOR AND HIS MOM
By Andy Weddington
Sunday, 26 May 2019

The average American is nothing if not patriotic. Herbert Croly

This Memorial Day Weekend ...

Colors

28 x 30 in.

oil on canvas

From our front porch, on the far side of a mammoth plush grass parade field, can be seen a formation of flagpoles. 

Twenty, some 30+ feet high, aligned as a rank at normal interval and spaced a dozen paces. 

The rank extends more than a couple hundred yards. 

Centered on the twenty is a group of four - two pair the same height as the twenty - and mirrored in echelon. 

And fronting the two pair and rank is one twice the diameter and height. The leader. 

All are white, topped with a shiny gold ball, have a pair of can spotlights mounted about a third of the way up for post sunset duty, and fly our country's colors. 

An attack formation it could be. 

On the porch before daybreak a powerful sight it is to see 25 American flags on the fly.

A Sailor's mom came to mind.

Thirty-one years ago we met for less than half an hour. 

Not since.

But her image clear in mind.

A Navy lieutenant and I delivered the worst of news.

Her son, her only child, a young Sailor, died.

She knew when first seeing us. 

Such anguish and pain on her face.

Sounds of distress and sobbing as we walked towards her. 

We spoke, per protocol, the words she did not want to hear. 

So many questions.

Why? 

Answers we had not.

Official duties done. And following some reassuring comfort we rolled the two-lane highway home through rural Mississippi. 

The longest hour.

What we'd done was duty. 

What we experienced a memory for life.

This woman lived a hard life; younger than her face and hands foretold. 

Home a 1950s vintage school bus on an overgrown lot. 

For that we needed neighborhood children to confirm; having driven past the bus several times looking for her seemingly non-existent address. 

Where the driver once sat was a small table adorned with an official photo of her son in uniform, an American flag, and Navy memorabilia he'd sent home. Proud mom.

Their names do not come to mind. 

Faces clear.

For the investigation still underway, we could not confirm suspected cause of death: suicide. 

What could have possibly so troubled such a young Sailor?

Did his buddies see signs?

Did his chain of command see signs?

And on the questions the living ask. 

The other day I saw the commandant of the Marine Corps recently made a strong public statement to the force. He said seeking help for suicidal thoughts is not being weak. 

He's right. 

Absolutely right. 

Strength of character and courage it takes. 

That Sailor died, circumstances moot, while serving our country.

He and mom remembered this Memorial Day. 

Daybreak.

Twenty-five flags aglow.

Back inside to turn to. 

That sobering duty does not seem all that long ago.